Before and after: keeping it real

This is a share that first appeared on my Facebook page.

The picture of me against the tree is 5 years ago. The other picture is today. I often don’t leave the house because I look like a monster. Today is a good day… I’m daring to be seen.. This is a disease many people do not believe exists. This disease that doesn’t exist keeps me in bed for days at a time. it keeps me hiding from other humans because I get looked at and treated badly. If I don’t wear makeup and look well dressed i get followed around in stores because they think I’m a drug addict or something. I don’t really know but I can tell what’s happening. I know when I’m being followed around a store. We treat people we don’t understand or know really shitty sometimes. This disease that I have never stopped treating and studying and learning about my beautiful wrecked body has altered my life and my view of reality

since there has been some discussion in the comments about what this disease is, I figured I’d share the “Lyme” category page. I explain why Lyme is a distraction and that the diagnosis is highly problematic…

Western medicine really doesn’t do diagnosis well. Not just in psychiatry but across all disciplines.

lyme and tardive dyskinesia for me are both parts of multiple systemic infections that psych meds caused and/or made far worse…. Injuries and infections both here.

More info:

Chronic illness: a kaleidoscopic view – All Signal

Lyme disease category – Beyond Meds

Tardive dyskinesia – Beyond Meds

Believe it or not the detox is going well.

Even though it is also life in hell. I’ve come to learn enough about this disease in surrender to know that I’m doing it the only way it can be done given the circumstances of my life.

I do plan to do a post on detox details because I’ve learned so much about radical detox that might help folks with extreme brain injury and late stage lyme both.

For me the die-off phenomena simply remains hellish for the entire process because there are many encased spirochete cells in the brain and body. I also had to get fat to essentially re-animate these things which are connected via an intricate matrix throughout every cell in my body. It’s been an amazing, if also ugly learning experience. I continue to hope for release and it still seems to be on the trajectory. Just takes a hellish long time.

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