we are being called to radical alchemy. the marriage of opposites…

a litany of Trust:

trust everything. trust yourself trust the environment trust me trust your lover and trust your enemy trust the trustworthy and trust the untrustworthy. it’s becoming grossly evident…that reality and the powers that be are trustworthy and steadfast.

***

I have been healing a long time chronic illness by returning to the ancestral diet I grew up with as a first generation Italian in America. I can trace back my fall from well-being from when I left my home and was removed from standard parts of my diet…

I did not understand the critical value of, most notably, cheeses and breads (sour dough!!) — both are loaded with enzymes, probiotics and are good for the gut. And both, in America how, folks are encouraged to stop eating them when they get sick and look to dietary means of getting healthy. I needed them to get well…to get back to my Italian microbiome. Only our bodies know the way back. I’ve learned to not take most “health gurus” very seriously at this point. They are handing out a lot of dogmatic BS. If they would be clear about the limits of what they say it would be alright but most of them are completely serious when they think that EVERYONE should do whatever the heck it is that worked for them.

***

Perhaps the “astral” realm is in fact access to the micro-organisms living in our very bodies….we are multitudes…and it’s all right here, right now. Physical and part of our bodies…we share a lot of the microbiome with others and it’s combination is always unique to us…our culture and sub-cultures change it as well.

we are like a planet…like the earth…chaos or seeming order may abide and it’s always multitudinous. Heaven and hell…right here, right now. This does not diminish the significance of the term “astral plane.” It expands upon the phenomena and experience. Communication with the microbiome is a grounded reality from which we stand to benefit. Many who have access are written off as crazy and drugged with neurotoxic pharmaceuticals which make the problem worse, more intractable. The experience is real. No delusion, just confusion.

Internal eco-system management (my term) is what is needed and mostly doesn’t exist in our medical establishment. Our understanding of the gut and microbiome are in a state of infancy and ignorance. Many teach highly questionable methods when they think they do understand.

***

While we are, indeed, brutally hurtful and ugly creatures when we remain conditioned, the opposite is also true. We are capable of pure love. healing is that movement into pure love. Truth comes to awareness only when we meet our deepest fears in love.

Coming into balance with that darkness that is in every one of us takes some time and we also become DANGEROUS to the status quo, so while we are learning to integrate and contain this knowledge, as sensitives, we become additionally vulnerable and at risk for harm.


We can move beyond this place of risk…clearly we also, simply, do not all manage to do that…people die, cut off from humanity, at this juncture. I do this work because it’s become clear to me that we are a people with serious eugenic impulses. We have all sorts of ways of killing off people we find problematic and we do it while pretending it’s just not happening. The people we happily throw away are on the streets, in prison and on mind-numbing psychiatric drugs. It may not be instant death (hence we pretend it’s not happening) … it’s death by grave and absolute neglect and ostracization, which we again, can always come up with ways to justify.

***

the beloved can come in any guise…even one of evil…good and evil doth collapse and it’s one trippy game of integration… out in the field with Rumi, beyond right-doing and wrongdoing. I’ll meet you there.

we are being called to radical alchemy. the marriage of opposites…

***

Honest and clear desire pursued is not just about self gratification but more importantly the fulfillment of physiological need. We are a well oiled machine when in alignment. That physiological need embraced and allowed will attune us to the nature of reality.

***

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5 Comments

  1. Hi Monica, short-time reader, first-time commentor. 😉 I’m enjoying your writings a lot. I just finished The Red Book, so the quote was one of my favorite passages from the book. I’ve been studying Jung, Ball, Rank, Freud, Frankl, my whole life, beginning with books on mythology when I was just a little kid. Later, these readings led me to writers like Anais Nin, Henry Miller, Hemingway, Steinbeck, etc. Then the existentialists had me at “Hello meaning/ meaninglessness.” Ha!

    I’m interested in your ideas about food. I’ve been on food protocols for my brain injury (the first one, an impact TBI, the second, chemical) led by a TBI specialist in Functional Medicine. My food sensitivity tests come back each time with an unequivocal “No dairy!” “No gluten!” along with foods I normally crave and have been eating for some time (6-12 months.) I’m supposed to “rotate” my foods every 4 days. I don’t have a problem with the restrictions, but I’m not entirely convinced they’re helping in the ways they should be.

    So are you suggesting your family/foods of origin are what your body needs? That’s problematic for me since I’m descended from Mormon pioneers, and they eat green Jell-O and funeral potatoes. Seriously, though, what about people who don’t have a singular or uncomplicated heritage? We’re mostly descended from Western European regions with a heavy concentration in Normandy (France) with a hefty dose of Scottish, then a small bit of Irish and Danish. I envy the French and their commitment to food-as-life and medicine. I’m not angry at the U.S., just… disappointed. 😑

    Also, while I agree we need to learn to listen to our bodies more, sometimes–esp. when our brains and CNS have been damaged–our brains will fight for homeostasis, even though homeostasis is “damaged.” So if someone craves citrus, it might mean they’re in need of vit. C, yes? But if your gut-brain axis has been thoroughly ‘wanked’ for a long time, the cravings might be the very things you can’t have if you want an optimum healing environment, so that’s a constant paradox I find myself up against. Sometimes intuition is simply our brains doing their job. But what you wrote about cheese–yes! And I was thinking that of all the dairy-based foods I miss most, it’s cheese. Hard, soft, medium, never processed, and sourdough is one of, if not my favorite, types of bread. So, it got me thinking (read: ‘hoping.’)

    Finally, I’ve sent more than a few people to your site to read about “Life after Meds” to give them hope. I’m very glad you’ve found your way, are still forging your paths forward. We’re doing our own “create awareness” thing, if you’ve not heard of it (why would you have?) called The Black Box Warning Initiative. It’s a non-profit and we don’t actively try to generate donations or funding because money (w/r/t non-profits OR for-profit endeavors) has a certain “tainting” effect on even the best intentions, I’ve found.

    Needless to say, feel free to have a gander. It’s mostly films, a new music video, writings, to create awareness for the dangers of certain RX medications, along with a couple of other doable objectives (get drug ads off TV and call for mandatory physician reporting on all possible medication-related ‘adverse reactions’ that end in death [suicide] or permanent disability.) We’ve got a petition going for the former, the call for banning drug ads.)

    Wishing you way more than luck and continued mold-freedom.

    Best,
    J.A.

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    1. yes! to everything you said. we’re all different and my micro-biome is totally chaotic and yours is too…IN TOTALLY DIFFERENT WAYS. So of course you’re right about your own insights for yourself. That is all I ever claim…as mutts in the United States we all have radically different needs. I have an English great-great grandmother and I feel her presence too in my micro-biome…I eat extremely internationally and I also found I had to return to many foods I eliminated for a long time…this continues…I do not eat those foods all the time…constant rotation. I eat gluten free, vegan, paleo and keto…it all just happens now and I watch…it changes all the time…my situation is that way because of what seems to be a very particular micro-orgnanism that is sort of the head honcho. Trust your experience…I share mine not that it should be copied but only to speak my experience and communicate energetically to those who can feel that. The details matter very little and will vary greatly from person to person.

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    2. and, J.A. — it’s great to meet you! BBW initiative looks good. I had trouble understanding how to access most of it though. Good luck!

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